The Always Placid Mormons

…is how we are described by the Catholic blogger who writes as “The Anchoress.” I read her pretty much daily. On the whole, she’s usually a refreshing combination of entertainment, spiritual insight, and wisdom. My kinda person, and especially so since I teach from within her tradition.

It’s always interesting to find out how you’re viewed by others. And I don’t mind being “always placid.” If, through this Proposition 8 tempest, one of the labels that sticks to us is “placid,” it won’t be such a bad thing.

In fact, I could go for the placid thing on my tombstone: Here lies Mogget, usually reasonably placid unless you get frisky with the 2nd Amendment or you proof text from the Bible…

29 Comments

Filed under Marginalia, Personal Issues

29 responses to “The Always Placid Mormons

  1. The Bible tells us not to have guns, and that the 2nd amendment should be abolished:

    Thou shalt not kill. (Exodus 20:13)

    And let none of you imagine evil in your hearts against his neighbour…for all these are things that I hate, saith the LORD. (Zechariah 8:17)

    And let none of you imagine evil in your hearts against his neighbour…for all these are things that I hate, saith the LORD. (Zechariah 8:17)

    Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. There is none other commandment greater than these. (Mark 12:31)

    Q.E.D.

  2. Kevin Barney

    When I saw this post in the aggregator I thought it said “The Always Flaccid Mormons.” I was going to take severe exception to that characterization, until I got here and realized I had misread the caption.

    Carry on.

  3. Chris H.

    The 2nd Amendment is the one the gets you frisky?

    Anyways, I think the placid label is interesting. Of course, I am often baffled by the things that get Mormons feeling frisky.

    By the way, the reference to “my tombstone” mad me feel sad. I do not like thinking of such things. (Sorry, must be a downer day).

  4. Chris H.

    (wrote the above comment before seeing the ones above it)

    Sister Blah 2,

    Please do not piss off the people with the guns. Especially since mogget knows how to use them.

  5. Mogget

    #1 LOL! A proof text on the 2nd Amendment — Great!!

    #2 For an opinion on that aspect of the LDS culture, you’ll want to check in with Feminist Mormon Housewives…

    Mogs

  6. Mogs–did you see my own tentative foray into the world of firearms? Your post was part of what helped me gather the courage to take the plunge. I thought, well, Mogget has a gun and she’s cool, so maybe this won’t be too scary…

  7. Mogget

    the reference to “my tombstone” mad me feel sad

    Ah, but it will be a most merry tombstone. I’m going to have a motion detector and a voice synthesizer built into it, like those Halloween decorations in Walmart.

    “Hey, get off me!”

    “Step to one side. You’re blocking the sun.”

    “What’s up with the cheap flowers all the time?”

    And more for Sister Blah 2 later — gotta teach first thing this AM…

  8. Mike Melendez

    As a visitor from The Anchoress, I surprised at sister-blah-2′s lack of a sense of time. Though fireworks existed at the times the various books of the Bible were being written, gunpowder wasn’t invented until long after the Bible canon had been formally established. Though it would be easier if we could pass responsibility for our chosen state of being to an inanimate object. Then you could claim _you_ were good simply because you didn’t possess that object.

  9. Dearest Mike,

    I think that Sister Blah2 knows all that — I think she’s having a bit of fun by prooftexting against the 2nd Amendment. She’s like that, you know…

    Nice, chaste, Mogget-kisses for all!

    Mogs

  10. Mogget, you’re Mormon, do you eat shellfish? Do you kill your children who talk back? How do you feel about slavery? Are you for returning runaway slaves to their masters as was St. Paul? What was that you said about prooftexting? Oh, and Polygamy?

  11. Chris H.

    djinn,

    You clearly have no idea about what is going on here. Do go away.

  12. Dear djinn,

    What Chris is alluding to is that you have employed arguments intended to embarrass and confound fundamentalists on a website populated by folks whose interests and taste in Biblical interpretation and application lie fully 180 degrees out.

    I will just add that your one-dimensional approach to the Bible is analogous at many points to that of the fundamentalists whom you despise, despite the differences in your respective ideologies. It would indeed be nice if we could all remake the world in our own image, eliminating those things that threaten and discomfort us, but I am afraid and both you and the fundamentalists are going to be disappointed. I do not think that the future belongs to either of you.

  13. Chris H.

    What Mogget said.

    I did not know if you all were checking in this weekend, so that was my best attempt at pinch hitting.

  14. OK, please explain why I’m wrong. I quite resent the idea that I have no idea what’s going on, after four years of seminary, infinte hours reading all of the standard works, etc. Is this just the Mormon Idea that you can just ignore any Biblical verse that you dislike, while deploying those that fit your specific purpose?

  15. I must mention that you, Mogget, were the one who mentioned Prooftexting first. Tag, you’re it!

  16. Forgive me, I should not have said “Mormon” in the context that I did two comments above. I take it back, with whatever invective you wish to throw at me, and replace it with the same statement with the word “Mormon” removed.

  17. Plus, please notice that I mentioned both the Old and New Testaments in context. An important point.

  18. Nice chaste Mogget-kisses to you, djinn!

    If, indeed, your sole exposure to the Bible is seminary followed by personal study, then many things are explained. The CES folks are uniformly nice people but their selection criteria often results in readings that are ahistorical, acontextual, and sometimes reactionary.

    Why don’t you take a course in NT at a local seminary — just find a mainline Protestant one, or Catholic, rather than evangelical? Or, you could just hang around here for a bit and watch what goes down. As time passes you will see references to book and ideas that you can pursue on your own initiative. Search David Clark’s writing for stuff like that — he’s a man who has recently taken the plunge.

    In any case, I have to get back to my Bible Dork conference, so I’d appreciate it if you could hold off the more unusual manifestations of Biblical erudition that have so far marked your participation on this site. And have some shellfish, will you? I’m going to a cocktail party for charity next Friday, and while I eat about five pounds of shrimp cocktail I am definitely going to be thinking of you.

    Mogs

  19. Chris H.

    djinn,

    Sorry for being so dismissive. I just think that you misunderstood the intent and purpose of the post. The is the “here” I was refering too. I personally do not just use the Bible verses that I like and ignore the ones that I do not. I tend to ignore the entire thing. Peace.

  20. djinn,

    This link and this link are good places to start with biblical studies (Moggett mentioned them in #18). Hope it helps.

  21. I am also very good friends with a Jew who reads Hebrew, and, is in, fact, a Cantor, which had made somewhat of an impression on my biblical readings; not to mention all that other stuff I read when other people are living their lives.

    “There’s more to life than books, you know
    But not much more” The Smiths, well, Morrissey, he wrote the lyrics; plus it’s the phrase I wish to cross-stitch (with cute Gladioli and hang up in my house, next to the “Noise” poster). But, the Gladioli escape me. A modified Rhodes stitch, perhaps?

  22. So, Chris, the biblical exegesis is just a front? OK, I’m cool with that. But why then the mention of “prooftexting,” which implies, at least, a hint that there is a text to be proofed.

  23. Oh, and Chris, piece.

  24. I’m curious, still, as to what biblical study you find palatable. A list, please?

  25. djinn,
    I’ve seen you around a lot lately. Please stop picking fights. It is irritating. I get that you didn’t like the church’s stance, but this isn’t the place for that discussion. Please stop.

    Regarding biblical study, what do you mean? Are you looking for a list of good books?

  26. Chris H.

    djinn,

    “So, Chris, the biblical exegesis is just a front?”

    I do not do bible posts. I am not even sure exactly what exegesis means. Though John, Mogget, and David J. have tried to explain it over the years. I do not think that I have ever done any biblical prooftexting, though I do like to text on my phone. Thanks for proving my original point. Happy Thanksgiving.

  27. You guys are so nice to trolls.

  28. djinn

    To all and sundry, the phrase “biblical exegesis” refers to studying the original meaning and intent of specific verses in the, wait for it, bible. That is what you talked about. Thank you for calling me a troll for attempting to answer your question, sincerely.

  29. Actually djinn, it depends on the context. Most broadly, the word “exegesis” comes from a Greek word meaning “to lead or bring out.” In the current context exegesis means to lead to bring out the meaning of a biblical text. This activity may far exceed attention to the range of possibilities generated by a straightforward interest in authorial intent.

    I am sorry that this thread still rankles you to the point that you return to it two and half months later. My advice still stands, though. You would find it very interesting to actually take a serious, graduate-level class in this subject and you will be able to join the conversation at a far more personally satisfying level.

    Mogs